What to Expect from Couples Counselling

Relationships can be incredibly fulfilling, but let's be honest—they can also be challenging. I'm a Calgary psychologist specializing in couples counselling, and today I want to share what you can expect from couples therapy and premarital counselling, how it can help, and why it's crucial to seek out a therapist with specialized training in this area.

ABOUT THERAPY

Kaylee Procter

7/23/20243 min read

Introduction to Couples Counselling

Relationships can be incredibly fulfilling, but let's be honest—they can also be challenging. I'm a Calgary psychologist specializing in couples counselling, and today I want to share what you can expect from couples therapy and premarital counselling, how it can help, and why it's crucial to seek out a therapist with specialized training in this area.

What to Expect from Couples Counselling

First things first, if you're considering couples counselling, it means you're ready to work on your relationship, and that's a fantastic first step. Couples therapy is made up of 3 phases, that are each an important part of treatment in the long-term:

  1. Assessment: this phase is arguably the most important, as it provides your psychologist with a comprehensive overview of the history of your relationship; your goals for couples counselling; who each of you are as individuals; your own perspectives on the issues in the relationship; and a chance to see you two interact as a couple. It consists of 3 sessions - the first will be as a couple and then each of you will have an individual session with your couples therapist. As a result of this phase, your psychologist will create a treatment plan that will be reviewed with you for your input and that will inform the rest of therapy.

  2. Treatment: what is worked on in this phase is the result of the assessment process. Some of the work may include, processing past emotional wounds with the help of your psychologist; improving communication and conflict management (with the introduction and practicing of many tips and tricks); practicing having difficult conversations; and exercises to create connection and emotional and physical intimacy.

  3. Relapse Prevention/Maintenance: after you've met your couples therapy goals, a plan will be created to continue connecting and communicating effectively. The possibility of occasional maintenance/refresher sessions may be discussed to ensure the continuation of a healthy relationship.

Couples counselling isn't about placing blame but rather about understanding each other better. You can expect a safe space where both voices are heard. We might use different techniques, such as role-playing or communication exercises, to help you see things from each other's points of view. A lot of couples therapy will be you two speaking with each other, with guidance from your marriage therapist so that you can start practicing how the "Masters of Relationships" communicate with each other.

How Couples Counselling Can Help

Now, you might be wondering how exactly couples counselling can make a difference. Well, it's all about improving communication and strengthening your connection. Many couples find that they start to understand each other better and feel more supported after just a few sessions.

Couples counselling can help you navigate through specific issues like infidelity, perpetual conflict, lack of intimacy or connection, external stressors, and/or parenting challenges. But it’s also beneficial for couples who simply want to deepen their understanding of each other and improve their partnership. It's about creating a stronger, healthier relationship where both partners feel valued and understood.

Premarital Counselling

Have you ever wondered what types of conversations are important to have prior to marriage? Do you want to explore those conversations, while also improving your communication skills and connection? Couples therapy can be extremely helpful for this. Premarital therapy typically involves addressing any current issues you are having in your relationship, but also having the difficult conversations that are important to have prior to getting married. Stay tuned for a future blog post about this in more detail.

Why Specialized Training Matters

Not all therapists are created equal, especially when it comes to couples counselling. It’s important to seek out a therapist who has additional training in this field. Specialized training equips therapists with the tools and techniques specifically designed for relationship issues. This includes understanding the dynamics of couples, conflict resolution strategies, and effective communication techniques.

As a Calgary psychologist with specialized training in couples therapy, I bring a depth of knowledge and experience that can make a significant difference in your counselling experience. Currently, I am level 1 and 2 trained in the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy, based on 40 years of relationship research. I also have additionally training in Emotionally Focused Therapy, which highlights the importance of attachment and our emotional experience in relationships. This specialized training allows me to tailor our sessions to your unique needs and provide the most effective support possible.

Conclusion

So, if you're facing challenges in your relationship or simply want to strengthen your bond, couples/marriage counselling can be an invaluable resource. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. By working with a therapist who has specialized training in couples therapy, you're taking an important step toward a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

If you’re in the Calgary area and considering couples counselling, feel free to reach out. I’d be happy to support you on this journey.